Your own worst enemy

You have probably heard about term your own worst enemy and when somebody shoots themselves in the foot. It is the oldest story in the book and one of the life´s pitfalls.

 Mickey Rourke his own worst enemy

Mickey Rourke was a brilliant charismatic handsome actor in the 80s. He shined in movies like “Rumble Fish, Pope of Greenwich village, Angel Heart, Nine and half weeks, Johnny Handsome”.

I became a huge fan when I saw Angel Heart,he was fantastic in the film. He was cool and likable. I started collecting his films. My personal favorite after Angel Heart was Walter Hill´s Johnny Handsome where he starred along Morgan Freeman, Lance Henriksen, Forest Whitaker & Ellen Barkin.

mickey-rourke-angel-heart

Mickey Rourke was a troublemaker, bad boy with an attitude. He went head on with directors and even studio execs. He was self-destructive and a nightmare to work with if he didn’t like you.

He rejected high-profile film roles like Top Gun, Beverly Hills Cop, 48 hrs, Rain Man.
In 1991 he quit acting for 2 years to do boxing his lifelong passion.

In 94 he returned to acting but his reputation caught up with him.Doors were shut he was out of steady work,the 90s were hard for him. He btw played a villain in Jean-Claude Van Damme´s 1997 flop Double Team which wasn’t a bad film in my opinion but then again I m a massive JCVD fan.

After horrible depressing 90s, he started to rise again.
In early 2000 he started getting interesting  roles like Man on fire, Once upon a time in Mexico & Sin City. In 2008 he came back with The Wrestler that also got him oscar nomination and multiple awards.

Mickey Rourke in The Wrestler

Things looked good for Mickey.He started doing high profile movies again and the public was interested in him. He was back big time.

This is a great documentary on Mickey made during his comeback year 2008.

He was humble and grateful for the second chance and talked openly about his mistakes in life and career.

Then suddenly it started again. Mickey bashed his own movies Thirteen and Passion Play calling them bad. He badmouthed his Iron Man 2 role which was a big theatrical film. He declined Seven Psychopaths role and called the director a jerk off.

It was very sad after such a fantastic comeback he turned to his old ways and started burning bridges.  The window of opportunities was open and he shut it down fast. Looking at his filmography now it’s quite disappointing. He will not get the second comeback.

You see this kind of stories where people self-destruct, burn themselves and ruin their lives. They are their own worst enemies.

Mouse standing next to dynamite

There are so many stories like these that it’s a cliche. The most famous one is where somebody gets success then starts the self-destruction.

You don’t have to go far to find people like these.
I know personally people who destroyed their friendships, relationships, work relations with their behavior.

People who want to burn everything good in their life. People who burn bridges.

Their attitude is taking away from their life instead of adding.
Is it the ego? Low Self-esteem? Ignorance?

What makes a person work against themselves?

Only they know deep inside.

Some people seek conflicts and confrontation. They burn bridges left and right. They tell everybody to fuck off. They don’t think about consequences of their actions.

Me the biggest obstacle

I had my short period of shooting myself in the foot in my early 20s.
In my case, it was low self-esteem that made me do stupid shit and spend my time with wrong people.

At a younger age, I had destructive energy inside me. I wanted to prove something. I was angry, insecure and dumb.Many times I played the victim in my mind and had negative mindset. This led to many stupid things.

Explosion

I also deep down didn’t feel like I was enough so naturally, I avoided any relationships where I would be exposed.

Many times I didn’t take opportunities that were presented to me because I was afraid of rejection and failure.

I didn’t think I deserved something, I didn’t feel entitled to it.I was on my worst enemy. I was standing between my desires and dreams.

I was self-destructive many times and ruined many great opportunities.

Couple years ago a girl that I really liked was interested in me but I was afraid to get hurt so I played stupid games. In my mind I was cool but thinking now what a fool I was for fucking up that opportunity.

I literally was my own worst enemy and ruined the opportunity I was given.
Sometimes I let my bitterness and anger make my decisions. I was too proud to challenge my  frail ego.

Thinking of how much time I wasted on standing in my way now seems crazy. But fortunately, we can learn from our mistakes. Fortunately, I could bounce back from the ground.

Luckily at an older age, I understand myself better. I have learned to control  my emotions. I understand what I need to do. I don’t want to hinder myself, I want to go further in my life.

Conclusion

It’s extremely difficult to succeed i anything in life if you keep standing in your own way.

Stop lying to yourself and stop standing in front of yourself.
Don’t get immersed in negative energy or spend time with negative people.

If a good opportunity arises your way, take it see where does it take you.

Don’t let fear control your whole life and your decisions. Learn to let go.

Raise yourself instead of beat yourself down.
Start being your own best friend. Instead of being your own worst enemy,be your own hero.
Life is hard as it is, things happen,we break. Don’t be your worst enemy.

 

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